UN: LethalProtector | video

[decodex]

Yeah, wow, I really don’t think anyone is learning anything here… like, school-wise. ( they say you don’t notices the pitfalls of parenthood until you have inter-dimensional alien children of your own… )

I mean, we should fix that, right? We can’t let people stagnate while they’re here. They should be learning stuff between, you know— train espionage.

( this place is so goddamn weird!!! )

So— can anyone teach chemistry?

Comments

[shoplifter]

Mhm. That's me.

[Very child, this one.]

... I think... everything. I was taught things, but like other kids.

So going to a normal school would be fun.

[Okay, there's nothing normal about a school here, but you get what she means.]

[decodex]

( yeah, he gets it. this is the furthest thing from a normal school for most people, but it sounds like it might be the only school laura's ever been to. which is... distressing. )

Everything. Big request, but we'll try to make it happen.

Where were you at where your main source of knowledge came from a collective of other kids?

[shoplifter]

It doesn't have to be everything. Just some things would be nice.

[Anything that isn't associated with the ulterior motive of turning her into a saleable child weapon. Speaking of which... well. She's never shied away from it, not here in Etraya.]

I was born in a lab called Transigen.

... They pretended to be something good, but they were a bad place — with bad people.

[decodex]

Oh... I'm sorry that happened to you. ( venom fills eddie's mind with the various labs he'd been held in, as if eddie couldn't imagine the inhumanity of lab living all on his own. they're all dark, cold places. venom didn't much like the labs. )

Are you here by yourself? Living by yourself?

[shoplifter]

[It's not particularly pleasant, it's true.]

Accelerator is my 'roomie'. We pinky promised on it.

[So you know they meant business.]

But I know how to take care of myself; I've lived alone before in Etraya.

[decodex]

( pinkie promises are pretty severe, even eddie has to agree with that. still, he frowns. being all alone in a place like this is also... pretty severe. )

Well, if you every want somewhere to hang out, you can stop by our place, alright? We've got a cat, and a dinosaur, and chickens... ( and an alien, and a brooding teen, and a partridge in a pear tree. )

[shoplifter]

[She IMMEDIATELY perks up.]

I want to pet a chicken.

I’ve never met a chicken before.

[A pause, almost girlishly sheepish.]

Do you have any horses?

[decodex]

Yeah, we've got more than we know what to do with, honestly. You're gonna see more chickens than you ever thought possible.

( it's just an ocean of feathers. )

No, horses, though. Sorry. ( war flashbacks to his last encounter with a horse. ) You know, I'm not sure if you'd like horses. They're—

—fast. Really, really... really fast.

[shoplifter]

[Laura appears to be on the move, in the video; you can only see the top half of her head, as she puts on her pink sunglasses on.]

I like fast.

Did you have to run away from a horse?

[You sound slightly nervous about her favorite animal, sir.]

[decodex]

Not... exactly.

( the venom!horse makes him very nervous!! )

I had to ride one. And it was... like lightning. Zoom. Probably the fastest thing on the planet.

Which, you know, might be good if you like fast things. I, for one, have vertigo. So not really my thing.

[shoplifter]

Un caballo mutante...

[Said in awe, her eyes widening behind her glasses.]

It is 'my thing'. I want to be fast as lightning. Fastest on the planet.

[She pauses in the street.]

Where are the chickens? They are probably too far away to smell.

[decodex]

Wait, you're coming over now? ( okay, yeah, he literally said 'whenever' but give him a minute to toss his kids' stuff in the hamper!!

but, well, if she wants to see chickens, he should probably show her the chicken house. )

You've got super-smell?? It's- There's this factory on the edge of town. I'll send it to your map and meet you there.

[shoplifter]

Sí, I have super smell.

[Do you smell like a symbiote, Eddie? Or just like a boring, normal man who needs a shower? She is very good at clocking people, you see. But the moment she gets the map, she's nodding (and is still only half a head in the screen all the while).]

I'll be there soon.

Do I need to bring the chickens any snacks?