un: jaycetalis | voice

[hexcope]

[The voice of a mid-thirties man, who sounds absolutely exhausted:]

So.

Who broke it?

I'm not mad. I just want to know. And have a long conversation about respecting shared resources.

[This is, of course, in reference to the now damaged blue trolley line.]

Comments

[badlydisarmed]

You sure they're hedgehogs? Squirrel makes more sense for a flying one.

Are there any vets here? Are we gonna need a pet vaccination campaign? Am I gonna have to run it?

I can't believe Joss Sweden would do this.

[hexcope]

As certain as I can be without seeing them.

As long as they don't bite anyone, it should be fine?

Let's not give Joss Sweden more credit than he deserves. I've seen sedimentary rock with stronger contributions to our community here.

[badlydisarmed]

The current rabies vaccination shortage is 100% Joss Sweden's fault.

He's also at fault for the lack of triple layer toilet paper at the Kwik Mart.

[hexcope]

You're implying he took them all himself. From... multiple rabies infections?

More information than I wanted to know, but thank you for sharing your wealth of knowledge.

[badlydisarmed]

You're very welcome.

Vaseline shortage is also his doing, by the way.

[hexcope]

you can stop telling me things about him now

[badlydisarmed]

But I'm just warming up 🥺

[hexcope]

How much more do you know??

[badlydisarmed]

So much. TOO much.

The images, Jayce, they haunt me. I can't sleep.

[hexcope]

Now you're just messing with me.

[badlydisarmed]

Not on purpose. I thought you were in on it.

[hexcope]

I was believing your every word until 'can't sleep.' I have a hard time believing anything would actually give you a nightmare.

[badlydisarmed]

I'm a vulnerable soul, Jayce. Some things keep me awake at night, imagine how hard life is for all of the neighbors of Joss Sweden.

[hexcope]

Good thing he lives in a big castle in the middle of nowhere, then. Some self-awareness, at least?

[badlydisarmed]

If I get enough points do you think I can ask for the castle to collapse on him?

[hexcope]

You can't, and shouldn't, ask for the castle to collapse on him.

[...But this is the guy who's been threatening to kill random people on the network, isn't it? Aside from the ableism, it's clear he's not a nice guy.]

But I do have to wonder about the structural stability of it, if there was a dangerously explosive outside force introduced.

[badlydisarmed]

Completely unrelated, I have reconsidered the weaponization of the arm.

Can you make it blow up weight-bearing castle walls?

[hexcope]

Another no from me, Robert. You'll have to find some sort of blue-haired explosives expert elsewhere, if they even exist.

[He's not helping. Directly.]

[badlydisarmed]

But Jayce, what if I ever find myself in a situation where I have no choice but to blow a load-bearing wall for my own survival?

[hexcope]

[That almost works, for about .03 seconds.]

If you want upgrades to the arm, then we can talk upgrades, but I'm not adding weapons.

@cid; voice

[levindicated]

Hey- I know he’s got the personality of an unwashed fishing net, but it’s a big castle. There’s other people who live there. Do you mind?

[badlydisarmed]

Buddy, bro, babe, whoever you are. Why the fuck would you take me seriously? What part of my whole everything would lead you to believe I'd go through the trouble of trying to kill one really annoying, obviously superpowered dude, when I know for a fucking fact that not only would he be brought back, he would come back worse?

Come up buttercup, be reasonable.

[levindicated]

Well, honeytits- ‘Cause plenty of dumber men have been completely serious about the undertaking. And yes, they’ve all been smeared on the castle cobbles. Always stinks in the summer.

[You think a snake doesn’t know snake behavior? Every joke has an undercurrent of truth.]

Alright, you’re having yourself a bit of fun. What’s the aim?

[badlydisarmed]

I'm a crippled civilian, butterscotch, if your beloved kills me it won't be because I got physical first.

I say words for my own enrichment. Someone has to have some fun around here, and it's for sure not gonna be him.

Cw: ableism (affectionate)

[levindicated]

He’s not capable of fun. It’s a medical condition. Be nice to him, there’s no such thing as a crutch for a brain.

Kitten.