Wade Wilson (Deadpool) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fourthwalled) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
etraya2025-06-20 10:29 am
fourthwalled) wrote in etraya2025-06-20 10:29 am
un:dp | video
[Wade pops up on screen in all his scarred glory, looking very excited about something.] Alright, listen up motherfuckers! I have a very important announcement! Way more important than our next mission or who's banging who-- although you feel free to give me that hot goss if you've got it.
We have a new arrival. She's the bestest girl and I expect you all to give her all the treats and kisses she wants! Be fair warned, she uses tongue. A LOT OF IT.
[Wade brings a dog into screen. But not just any dog. A dog that is so ugly she's adorable. At least, to him, she is! Mostly hairless, a long ass tongue that won't stay in her mouth, and bulging eyes. And yes, she's wearing a Deadpool uniform.]
Meet Dogpool! Mary Puppins!
We have a new arrival. She's the bestest girl and I expect you all to give her all the treats and kisses she wants! Be fair warned, she uses tongue. A LOT OF IT.
[Wade brings a dog into screen. But not just any dog. A dog that is so ugly she's adorable. At least, to him, she is! Mostly hairless, a long ass tongue that won't stay in her mouth, and bulging eyes. And yes, she's wearing a Deadpool uniform.]
Meet Dogpool! Mary Puppins!
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(do not worry she will not)
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I think that negates anything even potentially positive about him.
He was too nice. Naive. Not a violent bone in his body.
The worst.
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ugh, ew, no, no, no no no no no