etraya | un: Bachelor

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un: Bachelor | text

Attention Fellow People of Etraya,

I am Doctor Daniil Dankovsky, Bachelor of Medicine. As I understand it, few of you have seen a doctor lately. That simply won’t do! Please, don’t wait to get sick to establish care. I am situated in the hospital, ready to take consent forms and make updated medical histories. At least a few of you have unaddressed concerns, I just know it. The average person comes to see the doctor when it’s too late! Though we cannot die here, there is no reason to suffer unduly.

And if you are otherwise healthy, perhaps think of it as helping me out. In the event of an outbreak, it is far more helpful to have complete clinical pictures of the inhabitants. Especially, as I understand it, there are many biological differences in this population.

Please come visit me during my clinic hours, every day from 10am to 6pm.

[What Daniil really wants is to meet more of the unusual inhabitants of Etraya more quickly as well as conduct casual interviews of the sort of people who are slated to save the universe. But he can’t just say that completely outright.]

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A small wonder you’re alive-

[He stops himself.]

Or…?

[He lets out a big sigh.]

I lived, which was a goddamn miracle. [He had an amazing doctor who saved him!] I've only died here.

[Then the injury was from his home.]

Indeed. Were you even aware when it happened? Where was the entry point?

[Daniil kinda wants to see the scar.]

[It might be crass answering the way he does, but he jabs his thumb at the dead center of his forehead without hesitation.]

It was point blank.

[So yeah, he was very aware of it.]

[Crass perhaps, but Daniil loved when someone spoke plainly.]

[Keeps his hair long to cover it the scar, then?]

The surgeon must have been truly incredible. [Way lucky to be alive. And a miracle he didn’t require more mobility aides.]

How old were you when this happened?

[Accelerator drops his hand. His answers are probably going to sound nuts, but that's how it is when you're from an insane place like Academy City.]

The city I run is about thirty years ahead of the rest of my world, so they had the benefit of some really fucking advanced medical equipment and surgical techniques.

[He probably would have died otherwise.]

I was still fifteen. It was about four months between the time I got shot and when I was first dragged here.

Sorry, the city you run, ran at fifteen- Still run? You’re in charge of the city you were shot in. Is this running like how a gang runs a city, or how a governor runs a city?

[He doesn’t sound judgmental, exactly, but his tone indicates that he assumes it’s the former.]

[Accelerator notes the tone, and honestly? Fair. Who the hell puts a fifteen year old in charge of an entire city? A crazy person, that's who.]

Fuck, it feels like the former sometimes, but officially it's the latter. I'm the board chairman, the previous board chairman and founder of the city handed control over to me right before dying.

[.... He knows how that sounds.]

I didn't kill that piece of shit, to be clear. Someone had already beaten me to the punch, so by the time I got there he was already dying.

That’s absolutely mad. And the town didn’t riot?

[Daniil sits, crossing his arms. This is utterly baffling.]

Were you any good at it?

[Sure thing. There’s magic fox people, elves, vampires, flying super men. Psychics that rule cities. Why not?]

.........

[It's hard to answer both of those questions because yes, they did riot. Twice. The first after his very public trial, then there was the home-based protest where kids didn't attend school, which was followed up by riot #2. That isn't even getting into the lockdown and martial law he forced, plus the disaster that was Operation Handcuffs, and all the damage the city suffered trying to deal with the Transcendents, Alice, CRC and Coronzon.....

Sure, not all of it was his fault, and a lot of it was either instigated by external forces as well as magic, but at the end of the day he's still responsible for the wellbeing of all the citizens.

His expression hardens and he looks away.]

No. I'm shit at it.

Who was the insane person that kinged you? Or rose you to dictator?

[Its not like any other governmental structure worked that way.]

Is that a normal age to be given control of a city in your world?

A bastard named Aleister Crowley. Dunno if that name is going to mean anything to you.

[Harold had recognized him, so that confirms Aleister exists in other universes. He isn't sure about every universe but knowing Aleister, that asshole, he's likely at least existing in many of them.

He also doesn't object to that use of 'dictator.' Honestly, it's an accurate assessment of the power the board chairman has.]

No. I think part of the reason Aleister did it was to piss a lot of people off. I'm also the strongest esper back home, so he probably figured I was in the best position to make changes to the city.

He made the papers from time to time. But I’ve never much been interested in charlatans, cultists, or poets. Are you telling me he came to rule a city?

[Honestly if someone like him is behind it, maybe this starts to make more sense.]

Sorry, what year did you say you were from?

[And why was Crowley housing futurtistix technology?]

[Accelerator looks very exasperated. Not because of Daniil, but because anything related to Aleister is always tiring.]

He didn't just run it, he built the entire damn thing.

[A city founded by Aleister fucking Crowley. It's just as nightmarish as it sounds.]

2024. I'm from Academy City, which is a sovereign city-state located next to Tokyo in Japan. Why? What year are you from?

1920. And that bastard born before me, mind. He was known for “sex magic” in my time. Japan, you say. Surely he was chased out of Europe altogether by then. What did that scoundrel do? How did he achieve that longevity?

[This is going to drive Daniil absolutely insane.]

[2024 is absolutely buckwild to him. As far as he can tell everyone from 2003 onward has metal limbs and lives in ways beyond his wildest dreams. People get superpowers. Aliens land. Madness!]

[It's kind of nice hearing someone else refer to Alister in a derogatory way, and his lips tilt upwards. His feelings toward that asshole are a bit complicated, enough that he no longer wants to kill him, but he still dislikes him. It's impossible to forget all the damage Aleister caused in his life and the lives of countless other kids.]

I don't know, probably some magic bullshit. Or a combination of magic and science, because he's an expert with both.

[He waves his free hand.]

That's why he founded my city. It's a scientific garden of eden, meant to develop and study espers.

How did real magic appear out of nowhere after my time?

[Daniil cannot possibly unpack all of that for himself. He’s denying a lot of truth to do it.]

Is it truly a Garden of Eden? Where and when did these espers spring from?

Your universe is probably different. It's been around forever where I'm from, but it wasn't public knowledge until recently.

[He doesn't really know the details about the history of magic, so he can only shrug.]

Well, the naturally-born ones are just that - they're born that way. I don't know how the fuck that works. The rest of us are what you get when you take a kid and subject them to a bunch of medical procedures. It turns out if you break a kid's mind and body in a really specific way, they can warp reality using mathematical equations.

What is he doing in multiple universes? Wasn’t one of him enough?

[That second bit. Perhaps Daniil should reject it. But… recent days made that feel more possible.]

Impossible objects. Kaminsky would hit the roof.

Of course not. That would never be enough for that bastard.

[Even back home Aleister made use of multiple versions of himself. His ego is the size of the planet.]

What the hell are you talking about?

Sorry, are you the only one allowed to mention people and places to introduce them to a conversation? Impossible objects are exactly as they sound. Impossible things, even if they exist, they perhaps shouldn’t.

I have no particular bias against them. I think physically existing is enough to prove they are worthy of it.

The very concept of arithmetic breaking the minds of children sounds like something kids would tell one another to explain a headache.

[This guy is touchy, isn't he?]

You're not wrong. [He can't imagine regular kids being anywhere near as used to or enthusiastic about math as espers. That, and 'impossible' is a good way to describe espers.] But think about it. Mathematical equations are the building blocks for the universe. If you're going to explain how something fundamentally works, when you really dig down, the root of that explanation is going to be based in math.

So if you're gonna influence the world, the best way to do it is with math. Even if it's impossible there's still some logic behind it.

[He is SO touchy.]

Of course. It makes sense. [ Danill turns towards his doctor bag and pulls something out. They’re blueprints for a structure that looks like something between a spine and a hornet’s thorax. The geometry is enough to drive any regular person insane.]

[Accelerator blinks, then wanders closer out of curiosity. He wants to see the papers Daniil has, and if he's allowed a look he stares, furrowing his brow.]

That's your 'impossible object'?

It’s not mine. But it is one of them. Belongs to a town out in the steppe.

[Oh yeah, he’s allowed to look.]

Ever seen anything like it? They call it the Polyhedron. Suspended on a stairway to heaven, made of glass and paper. It might cost a man his life just for drawing these plans.

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