un: kidomega | text

[querulus]

what's up girls gays and theys. before we head out on the most epic of fetch quests allow me to remind/inform you that your friendly neighborhood omega level telepath is available as a non-echo/aurora/whomstever the fuck monitored means of communication around these parts. those of you who may know sophie? i'm basically her but better in every way.

now. i know what you're thinking. no seriously i do. "who the hell is this guy and why should i trust him with my precious private brain thoughts? those are for me and my diary ONLY!!" valid question. allow me to supply my resume.
- avenger
- x-men 
- x-force
- last omega level mutant standing in this dump
in summary: big damn hero and op as fuck.

services i can provide:
- telepathic comms (obvi)
- remote monitoring of team member locations and statuses
- scanning for all thinking life-forms within a given radius 
- emergency contact for reinforcements/next of kin

pretty good deal, right? you bet your ass it is. okay okay, but where's the catch? what about rules? caveats? are there rules and are they reasonable? yes and yes.

my rules:
1. nobody whose name starts with "v". i'm biased and no i will not share why.
2. don't send me your spam. this is a professional line NOT a candy gram service.
3. i reserve the right to deny services for anyone whose brain stinks excessively. some of y'all are nasty.

okay peace out, hmu, like and subscribe 

- Quentin Quire 

ALSO if you're that little raccoon twerp who keeps popping up on the network to talk shit about how much you hate telepaths, DNI

Comments

[querulus]

wait hold on

are you saying i should go to a party of uppity rich psychos and murder them??

[taxevasion]

I'd make sure they were all doing insider trading first.

But that's like basically a gimmie at this point.

[querulus]

no way dude i'd get dumped in some kind of superjail prison never to see the light of day again SO fast. wolverine gets away with that shit but that's only because he can't die and the avengers play favorites.

[taxevasion]

And this is why it's stupid to have such an obvious look. "Look at me, I'm Quentin Quire, and I can do all these things and go to all these places." You don't cover your tracks, you don't hide your identity, of course you'd get caught.

[querulus]

look man i could shut down their brains from 4000 miles away and never make a peep about it. any telepath with half a brain would know my psychic signature, and believe me, my world is lousy with half-brained telepaths. or worse, full-brained ones.

[taxevasion]

You're telling me you can do all that cool stuff and you can't disguise a signature?

[querulus]

somebody would find out, buddy. trust me on that.

you wanna know why i joined a superhero team? you get to kick the shit out of baddies without everyone getting pissed at you.

[taxevasion]

I guess that's all we can expect from someone who calls themself an omega...

[The derogatory tone is there.]

But then everyone gets mad at you if you go beyond just kicking the shit out of them! Trade off is barely worth it.

[querulus]

uh dude omega is the highest level of mutant, wtf are you talking about. i'm the strongest telepath on the damn planet right now back home.

[He'll get back to that other stuff in a second, okay. Right now he is Offended.]

[taxevasion]

They call the strongest people omegas? oh my god.

[querulus]

yeah you know like the end? the ultimate? can't get any better? do i need to explain the greek alphabet and symbolism to you?

[taxevasion]

Here.