un: Dankovsky | video

[thantagonist]

[Daniil posts live from a café near the museum. He has no patience for typing responses, and his own visage should explain why. His nose has recently been broken and reset. He looks exhausted and irritated, but he has a duty.]

I need a couple people to come down to the café near that absurd museum with the sewn up fruit exhibits. Bring a stretcher, we have a patient who could use some more urgent treatment.

[From somewhere offscreen, a voice that is distinctly not Daniil’s states:] This Etrayan shot me in an attempt to get information I did not possess. I would appreciate his removal from my presence.

Now- That’s not true at all. That is not the reason you were stopped. [Daniil now regrets making a video, but what’s done is done. ]

Comments

[thantagonist]

I can’t believe you’re making me do this in imperial with a decimal and mixed measurements like that. Whatever.

2 feet long-
2.3 feet wide?
180 inches deep?

Fine. It’s 24 inches long, 27.6 inches wide, and 180 inches deep. The decimal makes me think that you either didn’t measure all that accurately, or you should have just used metric, because you have me talking about 119,232 square inches of cocaine, which is an utterly meaningless dimension to me. … Or it’s 69 cubic feet.

Drugs, including cocaine, are typically measured in weight or some volume that doesn’t make my skin itch.

Unless this is just what houses the cocaine- Then let’s make it less horrible. This is 61 cm by 70 cm by 457 cm.

The first thing that comes to mind is some sort of pipe. But a pipe typically has a regular circumference. 4.5 meters is too long to be most household surfaces. That’s a very strange size for any sort of dumpster, as well.

Is it housed entirely outdoors in this container, or within another room?

[p2iioniic]

ii don't know iif ii am 2ad you diidn't laugh at the 69.
or entiirely un2urprii2ed.

you're really fiiendiing for iit 2o a2 a reward ii wiill actually tell you where iit ii2.
no one can 2ay ii don't do you human2 any favor2.

[ He sends a picture of a map. It's actually the same map he had sent to Harold, with three locations circled on it. One, the library. One, the art museum, and the third, that had been undefined before for Harold-- is the cocaine pile. It's bigger than Sollux had described because he just wanted to do the funny sex number. ]



ii don't know iif ii am 2ad you diidn't laugh at the 69.
or entiirely un2urprii2ed.

you're really fiiendiing for iit 2o a2 a reward ii wiill actually tell you where iit ii2.
no one can 2ay ii don't do you human2 any favor2.

[ He sends a picture of a map. It's actually the same map he had sent to Harold, with three locations circled on it. One, the library. One, the art museum, and the third, that had been undefined before for Harold-- is the cocaine pile. It's bigger than Sollux had described because he just wanted to do the funny sex number. ]

[thantagonist]

Ah. Alright, I see it now. That’s a pretty good joke. I see now why the measurements were so absurd.

[He checks the location. Was it worth it to risk life and limb for this? He was loathe to cut further into the supply of lidocaine for his broken nose. This might actually bridge the gap. And it could be used legitimately for others to help stop a bleed and more.]

We’re hurting for medical supplies. This could come in serious use to stop bleeds or to be able to do certain procedures. God forbid if I need to do stitches inside a mouth this week.

[p2iioniic]

iif iit wa2 a good joke.
have a laugh.
type 'lol'

2ure whatever.
take a2 much a2 you want.
2nowflame'2 been dead for week2.



iif iit wa2 a good joke.
have a laugh.
type 'lol'

2ure whatever.
take a2 much a2 you want.
2nowflame'2 been dead for week2.

[thantagonist]

I don’t know what “lol” means.

haha

how’s that?

Who is Snowflame?

[p2iioniic]

ii wiill accept your haha.

oh ju2t 2ome guy.
2aiid the cocaiine gave hiim 2uperpower2.
ii thiink he wa2 ju2t really hiigh though.



ii wiill accept your haha.

oh ju2t 2ome guy.
2aiid the cocaiine gave hiim 2uperpower2.
ii thiink he wa2 ju2t really hiigh though.

[thantagonist]

How kind.

Likely. Cocaine makes people think they’re brilliant and invincible, but it usually just makes them annoying and gives them sinus infections.

I’m sort of surprised all of Pollux didn’t give up and just start doing it, especially the enforcers. It’s incredibly bleak out there.

[p2iioniic]

thank2.
ii know ii am.
B)

maybe everyone forgot about iit.
or maybe the people who knew about iit all diied except me.
not that he told me about iit per2onally.
ii u2ed two have camera2 all around the ciity before the electriiciity went out.



thank2.
ii know ii am.
B)

maybe everyone forgot about iit.
or maybe the people who knew about iit all diied except me.
not that he told me about iit per2onally.
ii u2ed two have camera2 all around the ciity before the electriiciity went out.

[thantagonist]

[On the concept of “ii”, the part of Daniil that is considering Sollux’s whole vibe and iconography wonders if he perhaps absorbed a twin in utero. He doesn’t know there’s no real utero to speak of here, but still.]

There is much to be distracted by. Perhaps that is for the best.

Cameras all around sounds incredibly useful. I wish I had such a thing to check on experiments. And my work station. I swear, the number of times someone has touched something on my desk even with explicit instruction not to truly boggles the mind. But that’s technology far beyond what I’ve ever had access to back home.

You know, we didn’t really even have electricity when I was a boy. Much has changed.

What will you do when this is all over? Getting back to normal may even be surreal.

[p2iioniic]

[ Daniil you can't just assume someone has an unborn twin. ]

diidn't even have electriiciity?
oh my god you're 2o old.
were you around when fiire wa2 dii2covered two.

beliieve iit or not thii2 ii2 not the mo2t 2urreal thiing that'2 ever happened two me.
2o ii thiink ii'll be fiine.
a22umiing we don't all fuck up iit up and diie.
ii'll help bury the dead 2o the human2 can have theiir corp2e partiie2.
probably level that buiildiing the murder game2 are beiing ho2ted iin.
and dependiing on how the new AII goe2.
we'll 2ee iif they need coddliing.
and then ii'm goiing two lock my2elf iin my room and not come out for 2 week2.



diidn't even have electriiciity?
oh my god you're 2o old.
were you around when fiire wa2 dii2covered two.

beliieve iit or not thii2 ii2 not the mo2t 2urreal thiing that'2 ever happened two me.
2o ii thiink ii'll be fiine.
a22umiing we don't all fuck up iit up and diie.
ii'll help bury the dead 2o the human2 can have theiir corp2e partiie2.
probably level that buiildiing the murder game2 are beiing ho2ted iin.
and dependiing on how the new AII goe2.
we'll 2ee iif they need coddliing.
and then ii'm goiing two lock my2elf iin my room and not come out for 2 week2.

[thantagonist]

I’m not old. I’m young, I am simply from an earlier point in time.

[Get it right or I’ll go insane.]

They had just figured out fire when I was born. It was a really startling culture shift from caves to medical school, you see.

Is a corpse party what you call a funeral or the way you view human funerals?

[p2iioniic]

look man ii don't know how long iit took you human2 two fiigure iit out.
two me ii saw all of humankiind develop iin the 2pan of a few hour2.
ii wa2 2crubbiing through a tiimeliine of hootiing and holleriing and 2uddenly you guy2 had offiice buiildiing2 and powerpoiint2.

...both, ii gue22?



look man ii don't know how long iit took you human2 two fiigure iit out.
two me ii saw all of humankiind develop iin the 2pan of a few hour2.
ii wa2 2crubbiing through a tiimeliine of hootiing and holleriing and 2uddenly you guy2 had offiice buiildiing2 and powerpoiint2.

...both, ii gue22?