text; un: appleaday

[saudades]

hiiii everyone! you can call me dazai.

since we're all supposed to work together and get to know each other, i thought it would be fun to play a little icebreaker game that's popular on my earth ♥

it's called would you rather! the rules are pretty simple:

✦ post a hypothetical between two difficult choices
✦ have others choose between them, and offer their own hypotheticals in return
✦ go back and forth until you don't feel like playing anymore

noooormally, it'd be cheating to say something like both, or neither, but if you can come up with a really interesting alternative, i'll allow it~

feel free to respond to each other, as well! can't just let me go having all the fun, after all.

here's a few to get us started:

1) would you rather hurt someone to protect yourself, or get hurt protecting someone else?
2) would you rather be unable to have your favorite meal again, or be unable to get drunk again?
3) would you rather betray your boss or abandon your best friend?

[wdym these are weird questions, he's so normal. it's just a gaaaaame and definitely not a covert means of information gathering or anything. come on and play :)]

Comments

[redheadcarrier]

two is easy, What do I care about getting drunk?

[saudades]

[There's any number of responses he could give, here, but most of them would be a little too revealing, especially if her answer isn't to do with being--as he assumes--underage. If she doesn't understand why a person might chase the temporary oblivion of alcohol ... well. He's not about to illuminate it for her.

Instead:]

well, for one thing, it's a lot of fun!
have you ever tried it?

[It's also intriguing, Dazai thinks, that she avoided the other two questions. For what reason, he wonders -- guilt? anxiety? Or perhaps it's simply that the other questions are uncomfortable to think about. He can't pursue it, if he wishes to maintain the image of an oblivious fool playing a game that hits just a little too close to home, but this is off to a promising start already. A lack of answer is in some ways just as informative as an answer, in the end.]

[redheadcarrier]

[ Ironically, she probably would understand why someone might chase it. But she's never tried it and she doesn't really have a desire to, either. ]

not really. it seems like it jut ends up making you stupid.

[ That's her opinion on it. It might not be the most "adult" response, but she's seen Misato drink herself into oblivion. It's never seemed fun to her. Just weird and a little disgusting. ]

So I'll pass!

[revengeisalie]

[ Well, aren't you... chipper. Thanks to this being text, she doesn't recognize this as the guy who nearly attacked her with scissors, but this attitude is certainly remarkable.

Alright, she'll play. ]

Just a normal little ice breaker, hm?

[saudades]

[He's so chipper tho, don't you see the tildes and heart emojis? This is so casual and normal and fine.]

it's no fun if the questions are too easy, don't you think?

[revengeisalie]

It's not? I don't know how to play this game.

Seems very much like something Echo would come up with, though, if not connected with quite as much force.

UN: timdrake

[mostdangerousbird]

1's easy, get hurt protecting someone else. Two's kinda the same deal. If you're not more than a social drinker, you won't ever notice.

3 though - that's subjective. What's "betrayal" and what's "abandoning"?

[saudades]

[Easy, he says, and the bead on Dazai's mental abacus moves, slotting "Tim Drake" into the same category as Kunikida. His username is so clearly his full name, as well, and Dazai thinks he has a pretty good picture of the man he's talking to just from that fact and those few sentences alone. Someone straightforward, honest, kind. Prioritizes others before himself. Steady enough that the escape of alcohol holds no allure.

His hesitation on the third question is a little surprising, given that. Dazai presses further:]

it is subjective! that's part of the game, wouldn't you say? what does betrayal and abandonment mean to you?

[mostdangerousbird]

Things I’d be uncomfortable doing intentionally, but possibly a few I’d do unintentionally. But if it’s really my boss and my best friend - I can’t see myself doing either. There’s got to be a third choice.

speech to text, un:castiel

[messenger]

[ if the questions are strange, castiel doesn't notice. he isn't familiar with this game, though he's borne witness to some that are similar — drinking games, car games that humans play when they get bored over long stretches of travel. pity for them that they can't fly.

but these questions all seem almost too easy. ]

One, I've done both. But being injured isn't any burden to me. I'm not easily damaged, and I heal very quickly.
Two, I don't have a favorite meal.
Three, I betrayed my boss for my ... friend.

[ all right. his turn? ]

Would you rather... uh. Lose your wings, or be caged?

[ he knows humans don't have wings.

it's just the first thing that pops in his mind. ]

[saudades]

[There's two, then. Not enough to be a pattern, just yet, but Dazai notes it all the same -- another that would choose self-sacrifice over self-interest. 'Damaged' is a notable choice of words, as well. He'll keep that one in his back pocket for another time.

Even more intriguing is the answer to the second question; it speaks to someone who eats for sustenance over pleasure, someone who doesn't really think much about what they're eating. There could be many potential reasons for that -- depression, poverty, congenital anosmia -- yet the man doesn't explicitly choose alcohol, either. It could be implied, perhaps, but is it?

He doesn't press. Not yet, anyway. Instead, he focuses on the question posed to him; he assumes the intent is metaphorical rather than literal -- the nuance between being limited in some way or being trapped in another. It's a question that resonates, for Dazai, even if perhaps he doesn't understand it as literally as it was intended.]

there's a very famous poem that was written in my world, "i know why the caged bird sings", by maya angelou.

the caged bird sings with a fearful trill
of things unknown but longed for still
and his tune is heard on the distant hill
for the caged bird sings of freedom

in a sense, both options entail a loss of freedom. in the one case, it involves restriction, a limitation that wasn't there before. being bound to the ground where before you had command of the skies. but in the other, there's only a set space within which you can move at all. having wings becomes irrelevant if you can't use them to go where you want, where you can find other ways to get there by land or sea.


[In the Armed Detective Agency, there's tactics he can no longer use, strategies that are effective but unacceptable. But it's a sacrifice that allows him to be on the side that saves people. That makes his world a little more beautiful, so he doesn't mind.]

i'd abandon my wings

[messenger]

I see.

I don't think I could part with my wings. Even here, they're still useful.

[ and, of course, they're a part of him.

he understands that the reply is most likely referring to wings and cages in the manner of metaphor, but perhaps it's all the same, at least in the context of this particular conversation. ]

un: wanda

[wundagores]

[there is, inherent in what they've been told, a mandate to get to know each other. so wanda types up a response and sends it.]

1. I'd rather be hurt protecting someone else.
2. It would be hard to live without a favorite meal, wouldn't you agree?
3. If someone is my friend, that's much more important than a boss.

[everything that immediately comes to mind isn't something she wants to dwell on, though. it takes her a minute to think of something more innocuous.]

For my question: would you rather eat cold pizza or hot cereal?

cw suicide/SI reference

[saudades]

[And that's three. It hasn't escaped his notice that the only people willing to answer the first question are the ones who have chosen her answer. Nobody is willing to admit to selfish motivation to harm someone else, which tells him a lot, actually, even within the spectrum of possibilities for why that might be.]

i don't know, if i couldn't drink at all ever again i might just throw myself off a building!

...just kidding!

[he's not kidding.]

but there's such a wide variety of cuisines in the world, i'd be hard-pressed to choose a single favorite. so giving up just one would be less of a loss, i think!

[No it's absolutely the first thing. He's full of shit.]

anyway, i'd take the cold pizza!!!
warm milk on its own isn't so bad but soggy cereal to go with it? disgusting, no thanks

out of curiosity, would your answer to the last question change if you'd known your boss a long time?
maybe even longer than your friend?

un: blackhat | text

[equivo]

[ He's not answering those questions. He's not even acknowledging them. ]

Would you rather be invisible when you closed your eyes, or invulnerable when you held your breath?

1/2

[saudades]

[oh, that's really interesting. an outright refusal? but he replied anyway with his own question. fascinating.]

[saudades]

you're not even going to answer oooone of the questions???
i worked so hard on them !! (╥ᆺ╥；)

text. @wild.flower

[hasitsthorns]

oh!! this is cute
let's see...

2) unable to have my favorite meal! food is nice and all, but I'd hate to be unable to get at least a little buzzed now and again

all the ones that immediately come to mind for me to ask probably aren't PG enough for the network

[saudades]

right? there are many meals i would enjoy nearly as much, while losing the ability to get buzzed entirely would have no such replacement! it'd be terrible!

[It really is amusing, to Dazai, how many people have answered only the seemingly innocent question put in with the others to get people's guard down and accept it at face value as a game. The avoidance is practically an answer in itself, at this point, given the answers of those who haven't dodged the questions have all been the same.]

PG? are there truly such innocent eyes to be protecting, here?

[fun fact in Japan there is only G and PG-12 before you start getting into the restricted films so Dazai is definitely raising an eyebrow over on his end on the notion that there are kids younger than 12 representing their universes here. Even Kyouka is 14, and he himself was fifteen when he officially joined the Port Mafia.]

[Text; UN: philanthropist]

[ghostlord]

1.) I don't mind either option, though for the sake of the game, I would rather be the one hurt.

2.) Another tough decision! Food comes in so many wonderful flavors. I would give up the wine.

3.) Betray my boss.

Now onto my hypotheticals!

1.) Would you rather forget a painful past entirely or be able to acquire justice for those lost?

2.) Would you rather keep your name and conscience clean and die early or commit enough crimes to harness the power you need for revenge?

And since those two are connected, here is a random one:

3.) Shoulder-blades or a pretty face? Which do you find more attractive?

sorry for the delay!!

[saudades]

for what it's worth, it'd be only your favorite food! losing access to ALL food wouldn't be anywhere near equivalent, after all.

[The questions, meanwhile, take a moment to think about. It's very clear these are explicitly personal; the veneer of hypothetical is practically paper-thin. The second one practically spells out what this person's answer was, as well, with the way the word revenge is conflated with justice. It's especially intriguing alongside the answer he gave to the first question; many would likely think seeking revenge would be incompatible with preferring not to harm others for personal benefit.]

both of those first two are complicated questions, and depend on your definition of quite a few things. do you consider revenge simply taking the life of the one responsible for your losses, or is destroying them in another way sufficient? say financially, socially, or politically.

similarly, what do you consider justice? if the one who took away those lost were to be seen as the victim upon taking revenge, is that truly justice? keeping your name and conscience clean is not always mutually exclusive with committing crimes, either.

[Speaking as an ex-mafioso who kept that shit entirely unknown to anyone around him for four years. Ahem.]

i wouldn't choose to forget. but what actions i took against the perpetrator would depend too much on the circumstances to give you a real answer, sorry!

as for the last, every part of a woman is beautiful, but i'll choose the face. it's what i will be spending the most time looking at, after all. ♥

text | un: LHG

[bergamotrose]

Well, aren't these personal?

In order:

I would rather be hurt protecting someone else than the reverse. It's only a part of my duty, after all.

Goddess knows, the second is tricky. I suppose I would prefer to continue eating my favorite food over never having drink cloud my judgement ever again. The bottle makes people sloppy, and sloppy is a state I prefer to avoid.

Third is easy. If my employer is dangerously incorrect in their decisions or judgements, I will certainly choose protecting my friends over following their orders.

sorry for the delay!

[saudades]

ah, duty? are you perhaps in law enforcement? it's good to know we're in such safe hands ♥

[Man, he is collecting SUCH good deets from this post. It's exceeded expectations, honestly.]

so practical, though. a coworker of mine would appreciate your answer. me, i don't know if i could handle being deprived forever! i might just end up doing something drastic~

un: mason | text

[ingestion]

I guess I’d rather betray my boss for that last question.

you must be really bored if you’re coming up with these questions though.

sorry, i forgot to hit send apparently!!!

[saudades]

[Interesting, for that to be the only question she chooses to answer. Most who wanted to avoid the uncomfortable questions while still playing chose the food vs. alcohol question. Maybe it's because of the cursed food trucks. Dazai's still pretty salty about that himself.]

aren't you? there's not very much to do around here except wait for our judgment!